Do you have a child who tells you he or she has done a chore and when you check on it, you find it hasn't been done? or better yet, do you even check their chores? I would. It lets the child know you care.
I had a 10 year old who had a laminated chore chart. All the chores she had to do each day were neatly marked on the chart so they could be marked off daily. At the end of the week, we'd wipe off the chart and begin a new week. After six weeks, she still had not done one of her chores which was sweeping the patio outside the kitchen.
A normal response might be to lecture her and punish her with a consequence. if I did that, she's just sulk away into her room, getting angry at me, instead of looking at her own irresponsible behavior. what could I do to get her to think about her behavior? I found something that motivated her to sweep the patio without being reminded. This is how the scenario went.
Me: "Emily, have you swept the patio today?"
Emily: "No, I forgot (smiling)".
Me: "Thanks for letting me know you're too tired to do your your chore. I guess you'll need to go to bed 30 minutes earlier tonight so you'll get enough rest to be able to do the sweeping tomorrow."
When tomorrow came, she forgot to do the chore again. I thanked her for letting me know she still wasn't getting enough rest and would be going to bed 30 minutes earlier than the night before (1hr). She began sweeping by the third day and we haven't had a problem with her since.
This approach places the units of concern on the child and not the parent. Learn to say, "Thanks for letting me know..." It will you save you from tiresome and frustrating arguments. let me know how this works for you.
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